


Fools In Lust and Love

by littlewonder



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Betrayal, Bullying, Love/Hate, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-06-27 09:26:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19788013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlewonder/pseuds/littlewonder
Summary: Vignettes from Snape and Lupin's relationship during their days as students at Hogwarts.





	Fools In Lust and Love

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted to [LJ](https://littlewonder2.livejournal.com/13826.html)

_Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving_

"Bloody werewolf!" cried Severus as Remus walked in. He had been sent to Dumbledore's office soon after Severus had walked away from Potter, who had pulled him from the tunnel, and now the Headmaster was trying to keep him from revealing their pathetic secret! Well, they could forget it!

"Severus..." Remus said in an emotional voice.

"What's the matter? Lose your nerve like your precious Potter pal?" Severus teased.

"What you've got to understand," came Dumbledore's low but spirited voice, "is that this isn't Remus' fault. I was the one who forced him to be there tonight."

Severus whipped around. "Yeah, right! You're just trying to cover up for your stupid Gryffindor House! You don't care about either of us!"

Dumbledore smiled, that sweet, cocky, know-it-all smile. "Don't be a fool, Severus. If you don't forgive him, you'll be forcing us all to carry on needlessly in misery. You don't want that."

"Oh, yeah, I'm sure you know bloody well what I want!" spat Severus.

"But --" began Remus, "you know full well werewolves can't control their actions in that form! Why would you even consider that I might do it on purpose?"

"We're not that close. Why wouldn't I?"

Remus was silent for a moment. Then, "We weren't -- this isn't a game, Severus! Can't you look past the surface?"

"I did; I looked past your surface and found out, even without the evidence, what you are. You're a werewolf."

"You know that's not what I mean!"

"No, you mean, am I a puddle?" Severus replied.

Remus looked expectantly. "What do you think?" said Severus.

"Boys," said Dumbledore, and Severus snapped his head to the old man, while Remus casually looked at him. "I'm afraid I'm going to ask you to save your fighting until you leave here. Severus," he turned to Severus, "I need you to keep this secret, if not for me, then at least for Remus. He is relying on you not to force him to leave Hogwarts for good. I know he hurt you, but I know you must still care for him."

So this was it! Right away, Dumbledore had been able to spot his feelings that was what had made him smile! And now he knew how to manipulate him! Severus was backed into a corner. It was begrudgingly that Severus had to admit to himself that he cared enough that he wanted Remus to stay, and he was kicking himself when he remembered what Remus had done, and especially that they'd have to see his decision.

"Fine," said Severus.

*****  
"Look at those two fools in love," said a passerby, a blonde Hufflepuff to her Ravenclaw friend, looking at two young boys resting together under a tree, reading contently and leaning towards one another against the tree trunk. One of them, a scrawny black-haired kid, suddenly flicked his black, glaring eyes at them, filled with a sudden rage, and they quickly rushed past.

"Severus?" asked the other, a skinny, ill-looking boy wearing shabby school robes.

"I am not a fool!" he cried suddenly, seeking out the other boy's tender brown eyes desperately. "I hate everyone else. They judge me before they know a damned thing!"

"It's not their fault. They're not perfect like you," Remus teased.

Severus stared at Remus. "Don't think flattery will get you anywhere. This is a mistake."

"Forget about them," said Remus. "We're happy. Nothing else matters."

"Maybe..." said Severus. "Let's just get back to Advanced Potion Making."

"Yeah," said Remus, while Severus moved his hand up Remus' leg. "Who needs them?"  
\--------------------------

_He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain that which he cannot lose._

"Remus, why didn't you show us this stuff?" cried Sirius one night in their common room. He was holding open Remus' potions textbook with all his scribblings inside from his and Severus' collaborations together. Suddenly James and Peter rushed over to see, and started protesting along with Sirius.

"Sorry, guys, I guess my mind's just been a bit absent lately," he excused.

"Feeling a bit moony, eh, Moony?" joked James.

Remus chuckled a little nervously. "Yeah, I guess so," he replied.

"Well, we know what'll cheer you up; the full moon's coming in a few days' time. Should be fun, eh?"

"Yeah," said Remus, already picturing a more immediate night out that was sure to do the same.

"Mind if we borrow this?" asked Sirius, still holding up the book. Hesitantly, he agreed. He knew he had no choice. He hoped Severus would understand.

They spent the remainder of the night gleefully flicking through the notes Remus had recorded in the margins of the textbook that he had approved of as well some that Severus had refused to put in his own book. "Hey, Levicorpus is in here!" one of them shouted at one point. Of all else, that one made Remus feel the guiltiest, because he had told Lily about that one, and it had spread throughout the school.

Finally, they went to bed, leaving Remus the last one up. He got up from his spot on the couch, crept into the dormitory, and borrowed James' cloak. Then he snuck from Gryffindor Tower to the entrance to the Shrieking Shack, where Severus was waiting for him.

"You look cold," noted Remus when he had taken off the cloak.

"Then let's go already," said Severus impatiently.

So Remus directed his wand to prod the knot with a stick and they climbed down into the hole. As they began walking along the passage, Remus leaned against Severus, and wrapped the cloak around them. They must've looked strange, but it made them warmer.

"Severus, something happened tonight," said Remus.

Severus stopped, forcing Remus to stop too. "What?" Severus asked.

"Sirius found my scribblings. From Advanced Potions Making."

Severus looked aghast. "You didn't let them read it, did you?"

"I had to!" said Remus defensively, and Severus was already breathing in exasperation, "I didn't know what else I could do! I don't want to lose you, Severus, but I'm afraid to lose them, too!"

Severus pushed Remus away, and stormed back towards the entrance. Remus hurried after him, trying to pull him back. "Severus --"

"I trusted you! But you're just like them, aren't you? You're not so innocent, don't even try to deny it! What was I thinking? This is even worse than anything they could've done! At least them I can hate! But you --?" He wriggled away from Remus, leaning against the hole which he would climb through in a moment's notice.

"Severus, I didn't mean to -- I didn't betray you --"

"Yeah? Yeah? I beg to differ! Those notes were just ours, our own secret -- and then you go and show your stupid friends! Besides, what about last year? How did that get out?"Severus snapped.

"Lily was your best friend! Surely you told her?" said Remus defensively.

"Or you did! Yeah, she told me about that! And now you do this? I figured it was pure accident on your part, and that it was as much her fault as yours, but now they've seen everything! And you let them! What do you want me to think, huh?" Severus ranted.

"I had no choice! If I hadn't, they'd have..."

"What, told you they hated you? String you up by your feet to reveal your dingy underwear to a flock of students? Perform horrible spells on you? --"

"The spells you use are about twice as bad as James'!"

"What would you know?" demanded Severus. "You're not me, you don't have the life I have! You don't know what I'm thinking!"

"Well, maybe if you told me, I would!"

"Forget it! I'm not telling you anything! Traitor!" And he climbed back through the entrance hole and into the night, making Remus feel like a fool.  
\----------------------------

_Persistency is a fool's best asset._

"Hey, Snivellus!" cried James as Severus walked down the hall. He was walking next to Sirius, and both boys were stalking towards him. They moved on either side of him and crushed his shoulders together with their bodies.

Then Sirius squeezed the back of his neck hard. "What the hell'd you do to Remus? He's been moping around the common room and we just managed to squeeze your name out of him."

"Begged us not to hurt you or curse you," added James. "Now I wonder why that was?"

"If you expect me to tell you, think again!" spat Severus.

They crushed in on him again. "You'd better," said James, "or we'll be forced to tell Dumbledore you beat him to a bloody pulp."

"Oh yeah? Where's your evidence?"

"Right here," said Sirius, brandishing a fist.

"You don't scare me! I'll bet your bloody loyalty will stop you, anyway," Severus retorted. "Besides, now that you've tried to kill me once, he can't possibly trust you much if you do it."

"Well, then, he's got us there, Padfoot," said James mockingly, "what do you think we should do?"

"I've got an idea," replied Sirius mischieviously, and in the next three seconds, they turned Severus into a mouse. They looked down on him. "What are you, Snivellus, a man or a mouse?" teased James.

Severus ran past James and Sirius, only to find himself being lifted off the ground by someone else. Soon, he came face to face with familiar tender brown eyes and a scarred, worn face. Remus wasn't smiling, but his eyes were sparkling like a disenchanted lover's -- which was what he was, still.

Then he looked to his two friends. "I told you not to curse him," he said simply, his voice monotonous.

"We didn't curse him," Sirius smirked.

"We transfigured him," finished James.

"Very funny," said Remus with absolutely no humour at all in his voice. "Turn him back."

"But we think it might serve him good like this!" argued Sirius.

"Turn him back."

"Fine," said James, disappointed, and in the next few seconds, Remus had to let go, but Severus was turning back into a teenager. Remus rushed in between them then.

"You've got Quidditch practice, right? Better get going; it must be halfway through lunch by now." With one last look each, Remus' two friends headed back the way they came. He turned around at the same time as Severus, who was already walking away.

"Severus," he said, and Severus stopped. "I'll choose you if I have to. Just please forgive me."

"You won't, you don't have the backbone. And I won't forgive you. Just let it go."

"No!" cried Remus. "I-I won't! I can't..."

Severus turned around. "Even if you didn't mean to, you still did it. And I'll never forgive you." And Snape walked away. It was a long time before Remus could forget about him.


End file.
